I spent my quiet day off playing my own version of Croquet by day, and checking out the Sussex Skyhawks at night.  What is hardcore croquet?  Fact is, we had no idea how to play real croquet when we came up with this version 10 years ago.  But now, here are the rules for you guys to have a summer of good times.  You can play any age, anywhere, anytime!  E-mail me... i might even accept a challenge from ya.

1.00 Match Preliminaries

1.01 The host sets up the 1st course. The defending winner in a challenge series will go first. If it is a new challenge series, a coin flip will determine the starter.

1.02 If played at a neutral site, the owner of the equipment will set up the first course.

1.03 The host must provide refreshment, snacks and a bathroom.

1.04 If played at a neutral site, players must fend for themselves.

1.05 Challenge matches and Tournaments will be played to a conclusion. No stopping because of weather or injury. Time limits may be set, but must be announced at the beginning of the competition. A match or tournament suspended due to time limit will be continued at the same location on ASAP. One full game(forward and backward) must be complete before play is stopped.

1.06 Though some extreme croquet clubs condone cheating, this is one area that will lead to a hardcore beatin'. If you get away with cheating during our little game, you'll have to answer to a higher referee.

1.07 Any situation not covered in these rules will be voted on by the players, if no conclusion can be found, a fistfight will decide the outcome.

2.00 General Playing Rules

2.01 Rules will be similiar to the stuffy British version

2.02 The course will be set up however the player feels. The more distractions, roots, trees, concrete, steps, dead bodies, bushes, streams, hills, holes, and crevases the better.

2.03 Each player will be allowed one shot per turn. A player earns a second shot on that turn if he/she
a) makes it completely through a wicket
b) roquets (see Terms below) another players ball. There is no limit as to how many times you can roquet another players ball. In order to croquet (see Terms) a players ball, the two balls must end up touching. WE DO NOT play the rule, where if you roquet a players ball, you get to pick up the ball and place it next to the other ball. We feel that takes away strategy from the game.
c) If your ball is touching an opponent, you MUST CROQUET that ball. You cannot continue to "drag" it with you.

2.04 Any act of intentional malice towards a mallet or shrubbery is encouraged and laughter at other players misfortunes is mandatory.
a) If a player, while inflicing malice on a shrub, breaks his mallet, or breaks his ball, that player is screwed. You must finish that game with whatever you got left. (Use the LARGER half or piece of the ball.) You may replace a mallet or ball after that particular GAME, if there is one available.

2.05 If a player, uproots or destroys a wicket while attempting a shot, the play will become dead, all players balls will be returned to their original spot, and the player will lose their next turn.

2.06 All balls will be played where they lie. The only exception is if the ball is rolling into an open sewer or water deeper than a mallets length. The play will become dead, all balls will be returned to their original spots and the player will lose 5 turns. Play is not dead however, if the ball is croqueted by another player.

2.07 If a player swings and misses the ball, three times in a turn, the player will lose that turn. See Terms under "KINGMAN"

2.08 If a player, whether on accident or not, moves any balls on the course, that player is
a) an idiot 
b) and will be forced to lose their next turn. The moved balls shall be returned to the point where they were before the dummy stepped on, kicked, or fell into them.

3.00 Challenge Series

3.01 A Challenge Series is a match between two players.

3.02 The match is scored like a tennis match. You must win 6 games to claim the match. A match must be won by two games, so if it is tied at five, then seven becomes the final, tied at six, eight becomes the final and so on.

3.03 Each course will be played forward, then backward. That means two games will be played on each course.

3.04 Each player will alternate making the course.

4.00 Tournaments

4.01 Each tournament will consist of 6 games. The course will be changed after each game.

4.02 For tournament play, points will be given to the top finishers of each game. (See Official Scoring)

4.03 Play will continue in each game, until the final SCORING position finishes. (In a 5 or 6 player tournament, the 4th Place finisher.) In tournaments of only three players, the game will end after the second player hits the post.

4.04 If a tournament is tied at its conclusion, a one round playoff will be used to determine a winner

5.00 Terms

5.01 Commands: These are words used when you have an obstructed view of the rest of the players.
a) "Go ahead" - this is said rather solemnly when you shoot and miss the wicket, this signifies the next player may attempt his shot.

b) "thru!!" - this is said rather triumphantly when you make it thru the wicket, this signifies that You go again and everyone else must wait

5.02 Actions: The two "action" shots.
a) Roquet: The roquet is making contact with an opponents ball. It earns you another shot. You use the roquet to set up a shot, or to set up a croquet.
b) Croquet: To croquet an opponent, you must be resting in contact against that person's ball. Using your foot, steady your ball in place, and whack it. This will propell you opponent into the street, brook, stream or just really far away. When you are in contact with an opponent, you MUST croquet him. A croquet also earns you another shot.

6.00 Official Scoring

6.01 Scoring for a Challenge series is based on how many games a player wins. Each match won, counts towards the overall challenge.

6.02 The playing seasons are divided into four parts. Winter, Spring, Summer, and Fall. Each Challenge series ends with the start of the new season.

6.03 Tournament scoring shall be based on a point system. Each round, points will be given out as follows:
3 player: 1st=3 points, 2nd=2, 3rd=1
4 player: 1st=4 points, 2nd=3, 3rd=2, 4th=0
5 or more players: 1st=5, 2nd=4, 3rd=2, 4th=1, 5th & 6th=0